This was evident during a day of interviewing when I took the candidates around to meet everyone who lives at Durrants Hill. We met Annie just after lunch; she was cuddled up with Louise, a member of staff, who was reading a book to her and Annie was pointing at the pictures. We saw Louise prompting Annie to turn the pages which Annie did with a cheer and a clap. When the book was finished Louise did not take the easy option and return the book herself. She supported Annie to put it back and select another of her choice. Annie can be extremely affectionate but this can quickly change to a pinch or a scratch and a pull of the hair. Many would be reluctant to get so close but Louise was able to recognise the subtle signs that say this is a good time for me (Annie) to have you close, by using good observation and reflection.
Next we meet Ben, a very determined man who has a great belief in his own ability when it comes to cooking and preparing food. He has a pallet that prefers hot and spicy food and likes to experiment with spices, rarely holding back on quantity. Often he is reluctant to accept support, especially if he feels someone might take over. Farhan who was supporting Ben stood back observing as Ben prepared a curry for his evening meal, never stepping in without asking Ben if he would like his help first. As Ben added his unique mix of spices it would have been very tempting to step in and try and persuade Ben to use less, but Farhan knew this did not work for Ben. Although the curry was far too hot and spicy for anyone else Ben ate it with such pride. Over the months Ben has obviously reflected himself on his cooking and now is famous at Durrants Hill for cooking and sharing his meals which are enjoyed by those supporting him.
Danielle was supporting Hayley a young woman who due to ‘obsessive, compulsive disorder’ finds coping with certain every day words being said, extremely difficult. She calls them her ‘forbidden words’ as they cause her anxiety levels to peak and cause her great distress. Many people do not understand this but Danielle expertly and creatively navigated around a conversation they were having, quickly responding with alternative words. She also carefully and discreetly directed it so that the candidate being shown around was never in a position where she could respond with one of the ‘forbidden words’.
Hayley is an articulate lady but her autism makes expressing her worries that are the cause of her anxiety particularly difficult. Often the question she is asking that is causing her to worry is not actually the question she wants the answer to and you need to unpick bit by bit to reveal what she is actually worried about in order for you to help her. Later that day when showing another candidate around we met her again with Antoinette and witnessed how Antoinette was able to pick up on her body language and hints that enabled her to ask the right questions and help her through her fears. With Antoinette’s encouragement and support Hayley has achieved so much. When Hayley first moved to Durrants Hill her fear of fungi meant she would not leave the house and go outside without a mask. Hayley no longer wears a mask and even walked through a field where mushrooms had grown - after Antoinette cleared a path.
Last of all we meet Steve who was being supported by Tim. Steve loves his DVDs and will often act out scenes from them. That day Steve seemed to being having great fun as he would mimic a line or action from some of his favourite action films and Tim responded with the next line and action. Tim really had to be observant and reflective to ensure his response was going to be the right one that would make sense to Steve.
But what really makes me smile even on those days when it can feel like everything is against you is the interactions that the people we support have with each other as they share in the experience of settling into a completely new environment with a completely new team of people supporting them.
Often I can hear Annie in the communal kitchen with Andrew singing along together to Capital Gold or Andrew stepping in to cheer Annie up by doing ‘This little piggy’ or ‘Round and round the garden’ with her, or singing the ‘The wheels on the bus’ to her. Or Ben, who doesn’t always appreciate the coming and goings of such a diverse group of people, inviting his neighbours in for a cup of coffee, or coke and a biscuit/cake, if he sees they are upset.
The way Steve and Andrew work together in preparing and clearing up after a shared meal in one of their flats.
How Hayley has introduced Steve to skiing and caving.
How Hayley in May when she first moved to Durrants Hill was so worried about people saying the ‘forbidden words’ that mixing with people was something she would avoid, but now she has celebrated Christmas and Halloween with everyone and two weeks ago she invited everyone to celebrate her birthday in her flat.
Using our facilitation skills has also really rubbed off on the agency staff we use. They have picked up on the skills and also use them to engage with people at Durrants Hill
There is no denying that working and living at Durrants Hill can be challenging, but then again it’s that that makes all the staff really appreciate those moments of ‘wow’ that the people we support provide… and we are lucky to have so many of these special moments.
Some names have been changed in this blog
Kath Connolly
Head of Service
Durrants Hill